I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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