Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Randomize
