Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize