quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
