im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
You had me at "let me see your balls"
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
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