I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
only you would photoshop your dick
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Randomize
