and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
50% drunk capacity currently
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
