I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
