lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
nutella sex= disaster
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
