why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
