That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Had phone sex with my boss who I still havenโt seen in person. Howโs your Monday ?
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ๐๐๐๐
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
