Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
