Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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