Well douche your snatch and let's go!
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
