he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Randomize
