i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
