We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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