You made me cry and you don't even care
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Randomize
