I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
