How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
