Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I think I just shit out all my problems.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
