Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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