drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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