I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Randomize
