her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
