Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
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