what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
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