How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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