i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
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