I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize
