if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
