He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
