ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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