okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
