I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
