woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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