I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
