Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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