Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
