Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
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