you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
