My liver just broke up with me...
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
I looked at my own cervix.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
