I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
