We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
