i don't plan on having that self control this summer
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Did you just see the Batmobile???
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Randomize
