A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
