I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
Randomize
