you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
