so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
