tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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