Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize