do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Randomize
